The Nature of Judgement, Forgiveness, Love and Mercy

The Nature of Judgement

The nature of judgment is one of clarity, sensibility, and unbiased views. However, people will sit in judgment of another based on their own views, thinking that if one person does not fit their ideal of what a person in a given position should be like, then they are lesser. People will also sit in judgment of another based on their religious views or society views, placing themselves on level with God or even going so far as to elevate themselves above God by condemning another to an eternity of eternal torment. When it is then pointed out that in some theological traditions, it is bad to judge, they then use another theological tradition to justify judging and condemning another to an eternity of eternal torment and, eventually, death of the spirit.

Problems with Judging Others

For instance, in the Christian tradition, Jesus says for us to not judge because we will be judged in the same manner that we judged another person. Many will then retort that we are to use our own judgment and to hold onto whatever is good or that, or, if you are spiritual, you judge. The thing is, though, when you condemn another, you are not using judgment or discernment. You are taking someone that you dislike or something you dislike about that person, and that is the basis of your condemnation. We are called to humble ourselves and to not elevate ourselves over another, but to consider others better than us in the Christian tradition. Yet, when you condemn another to an eternity of torment and then death spiritually, you are elevating yourself over another and even elevating yourself over God.

The second problem with Judging Others

The second problem with judging this way is that you are judging based on what you presume to be right and true about that person, when you do not know the state of that person’s heart, their mind, their struggles, their relationship with the spiritual, if they have a relationship with the spiritual, and you do not know God’s view on that person or their life. Only God knows the state of the heart and of the soul of the person, truly. He knows the secrets that are kept better than anyone else does, and while, in empathy, we may catch glimpses of that, God knows it on a personal level, just as it is known the atoms on the smallest level and the interactions there.

The third and biggest problem with Judging Others

The third problem, and the biggest problem in my opinion, is when you judge someone so harshly, you claim to know the mind of God. You claim to know what exactly is thought in this infinite being’s mind, based upon the writings of fallible men in a book that many have claimed is infallible because it was divinely inspired. My friends, the only infallible Word of God is Jesus Christ (if you are of the Christian tradition, that is).

You claim to know in your limited mind, that we use less than ten percent of, what is in this vast and infinite being’s mind who spoke the universe into existence. It is the height of arrogance to even presume that you know the mind of an infinite being, just as it is the height of arrogance and a largely misplaced trust in men, to presume that a book written by men who claim to be divinely inspired is infallible. You not only allow your own prejudices and fears to speak for you, but you also claim to know the mind of a Creator who spoke the universe into being.

As previously stated, in the Christian tradition, Jesus Christ was and is the Word of God. It states that in the beginning of the Gospel of John by saying, “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was God, and the Word was with God.” Judgment is not reserved for those who do not fit your ideal or who do not act accordingly to everything that is written in a book that was supposedly divinely inspired. And it is certainly no human being’s place to judge another.

Compassion and the Nature of Hope

And these are just the problems from a spiritual/religious aspect. They don’t cover the secular aspect of judging others and condemning them in this way. When they are judged so harshly and the door is opened for it, it then opens the door for biases, hate, and prejudices to reign supreme, when it is not in the best interest of people but used to promote greed and fear of something that people do not understand.

People were judged on skin color for a long time and viewed as worthless and lazy and dirty because of a darker skin tone, and were enslaved for it. People were judged as lesser and overly emotional and incapable of critical thinking because of their biological sex. Later on, people were judged for their sexual identity and orientation by being blamed and condemned to die a painful and slow death at the hands of a terrible disease.

The nature and spirit of judgment

The nature and spirit of judgment is supposed to be one based upon knowledge that is sought in many different areas and experiences gained. Judgment is supposed to be discernment and not condemnation. Judgment is supposed to be clear not muddled and sensible. The nature of judgment is not condemnation, but understanding and clarity. Judgment should seek justice, not oppression, and should seek after the overall good and not spread lies as has been done so much. And it’s not just religious people who do it either; it’s people who are not religious, who hold their own prejudices against people, either from bad experiences or from encountering one person. Either way, it is still judging.

So, instead of promoting hateful judgment, look at someone the way you want to be looked at. Instead of their actions, necessarily, look at their intent. Look at the why they did it. Use discernment, and not condemnation. People say that justice and judgment are blind, but they do not have to be. They are only blind because we make it so and insist on seeing everything in black and white, with no shades of gray.

Mercy is something that is often not shown to others, either due to pain in one’s life or due to anger and rage toward what another has done. Mercy is often discarded in favor of justice while many never realize that justice can be found in mercy. When I say that, I mean that justice and mercy go together and one can be found in the other because mercy is the forgiveness or compassion shown to another when you are in a position to hurt or break another. Justice is fair play or fairness.

Too often, people think that justice is sending a murderer to die, a rapist to suffer the same fate as what they put upon the victim, especially if that victim was a child. But, here is the thing; many people who do these things are broken, are sick, hurt, and lost. Very lost. And where is the true justice in hurting someone that is in such a condition?

The Nature of Forgiveness

Forgiveness. According to dictionary.com, it is the thought of or action of being forgiven; merriam-webster.com says that the definition of “forgive” means to stop feeling anger, to stop blaming, to stop requiring payment. To forgive someone is not easily done, however. In church, we are told to forgive so that we may be forgiven and also that forgiveness is for us, not them. We are never told that is a daily act, a daily giving over of something that has hurt us, angered us, and has possibly affected our lives. We are never told that it is not something easily done, but it is presented in such a way that it sounds so easy! And, it’s not. The idea of forgiveness, as the idea of love, faith, miracles, and hope, is so lovely and beautiful, but too many feel that it is unattainable or not doable.

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Here’s the thing. Forgiveness is something you have to do. Every single day. It is something that you have to practice every single day, something you have to make a conscious decision to do every single day. Forgiveness is a prayer of sorts- whether it be to God, Jesus Christ, or to the Flying Spaghetti Monster- it is a verb, an action, not just something that is discussed. It is something you actively do, something that you tell yourself, at the very least. Even if the person doesn’t say they are sorry or ask for it, even if it is something that angers them that you tell them or think because they feel they did nothing wrong.

Why should you forgive someone?

You’re probably wondering why you should forgive. Why should you forgive someone? Isn’t that up to God to do? Or maybe you think that you don’t believe in the holy or spiritual, or you just see no need for any hurt that is done to you. I’m not going to tell you that you should forgive so that you can be forgiven, so that you can move on- but so that it will open up your life and your spirit, so it can ease your hurt a bit, and so it can help you learn the lesson that was taught and accept it, so that the experience is not wasted.

Also, don’t EVER let someone tell you that it is not okay to be angry or frustrated when someone has hurt you. It is perfectly natural and it is okay. But what is unhealthy and what can hurt you in the end, is hanging on to that anger and letting it poison you and your life. Time and forgiveness can ease the anger and the bitterness, regardless of belief system, and that is what it is for. You will be angry on some days, and other days you will not be. I first posted this on Facebook, and, when I did, a friend of mine, Britt Brown, had this to say; “Forgiveness is a simple choice I think.

You simply choose to forgive. Just because you still have lingering emotional turmoil, doesn’t mean you haven’t forgiven. It just means that you are still struggling with the damage of the act you have forgiven. The practice comes in letting go, in accepting and embracing that pain and releasing it into the world, harnessed as energy toward something good. That takes sooooo much practice!” He captured what I was trying to say about anger exactly and he is right. The emotional turmoil is okay! But you still have to make a conscious decision to forgive and it is still a daily giving over within yourself.

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The nature of forgiveness is the nature of our spiritual side, of our soul. Forgiveness is not easy and the nature of it is a practice you do every day. And it is okay to be angry, and it is okay to hurt. The nature of forgiveness also recognizes that and accepts it. Just to kind of help remind you all of this. My “Nature of” essays will include this to help reinforce what I am saying by reminding you of the spiritual aspect as well as the mental, physical, and emotional.

The Nature of Love

Oh, love! Some of the greatest works of literature have been written in the name of love, by the likes of Byron, Shelley, the Brownings, just to name a few. Another work of literature that comes to mind is The Song of Solomon or the Psalm of Psalms. (Seriously. Read it and think on what the author of that particular book of the Bible is saying; the imagery used, the words.. *sigh*. So romantic.)

Many, when they hear the word “love” or consider it, think of, well, to quote Thumper from “Bambi”, being twitterpated. People think of the joy of falling in love, the joy of having that companionship with someone that you are sexually attracted to, and to be the center of their universe. Love, however, is a verb, a noun, and a promise. Love is something that you feel, yes, but it is something that, when you say, “I love you,” you are promising to accept their faults, accept their mistakes, and to show mercy and compassion to them in their times of turmoil and when they make mistakes. (However, there are instances where, while you forgive a person and may love them, you have to love yourself enough to let them go. In instances of any type of abuse, for instance. Feel no guilt about letting someone go that has abused you or tried to control you because you must love yourself and YOU DESERVE BETTER THAN THAT! And this goes for men and women, both.)

On that note, the love that few consider is the love of self. Love of self, as in all things, is not necessarily a bad thing, but many go too far with it, while others do not go far enough with it. It is okay to love yourself enough to take care of yourself, to get what you need, and to spoil yourself with a new book, or some chocolate. Self love primarily means being willing to take care of yourself health wise, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. It means helping yourself grow, and also being who you are meant to be, who you were born and created to be.

Familial love is present, and so many types of love exist within the world. Love for your fellow man, love for animals, and, as mentioned, familial love. All of these types of love require action, and hard work. It is not so easy as falling in love and then riding off into the sunset. Love requires so much work and it’s not all unicorns, rainbows, sunshine, and flowers. There are dark days, and, for some of them, you may be alone. But, on those lonely days, you can love yourself and use them to help yourself grow.

The nature of love sees the broken people, the hurt, the sorrow, and offers compassion, mercy, kindness, and support. The nature of love also sees the joy, the happiness, the light, and rejoices in truth and in good, with no boasting and no evil intent towards another. Love is the greatest action of all and leads to so many others. In conclusion, Mother Teresa once said, “I have found the paradox that if you love until it hurts, there can be no hurt, only love.” 

The Nature of Mercy

Now, let me be clear. It is not excusing what has been done. It is not saying that what they did is okay, because it is not. However, what I am pointing out, is that things are done like this because someone made a decision, in hurt, anger, a sickness of the soul or mind, and that shedding more blood or hurting them will not make healing happen for the victims that were harmed or their families. It will not bring back a person who died, it will not restore the innocence or power that was yanked away from a rape victim/survivor, and, I admit, neither will mercy. But why cause more pain and sorrow when enough has been done? Why hurt another further when they have only acted out of their own pain, or because of something that was done to them, or out of a sickness of the mind or soul? Mercy can stop any more pain from happening, and it can also provide healing over time. Mercy can also bring true justice because of the yoke being broken.

I say that because, when seeking justice against a person, and seeking it with an eye for an eye mentality, you would have to go so far back to where it began. It didn’t just start with that person one day; something had to happen for that person to become who they are and for them to make that choice. To find justice, with the eye for an eye mentality, you would have to go back to that person’s past, to whomever did it to them and seek their equal payment in that. And then you’d have to go back even further and further and further until it stopped. But, with things like that, there is a never ending cycle because it is an endless circle. Revenge does not help with that because you’d drive yourself crazy and also because you may hurt another indirectly with your actions and start another chain of events that hurts many people as well. It is endless and this yoke must be broken somewhere.

Why Does Anger, Hurt, and Sorrow Define Us ?

When a decision is made to hurt another, free will comes into play. We have the freedom to choose what we do to another, whether to forgive another or hang on to what was done. We have so much power over one another and ourselves. The problem with free will, however, is that people are very short sighted. They only see what they want, or what was done to them, and then they act on it. They don’t see how it affects another, or the full scope of their actions. They don’t look beyond themselves and this is why decisions are made to hurt others and why it is never ending. It becomes a yoke that several generations handle in their lives, along with their decisions and choices they make. It builds and adds up, and continues and it doesn’t stop- until someone steps in and says, “Enough.”

Mercy, as love and forgiveness

The nature of mercy sees free will and realizes that free will and freedom of choice affects us all. Any decision we make affects another. The nature of mercy is existentialist- an approach that emphasizes the person as a free and responsible agent for their own development through acts of the will. Mercy, using this approach to view life and the decisions of others, opens the door for the yoke of vengeance and anger to be broken. Mercy recognizes that we are all joined together, by an invisible thread, and that our actions can have positive or negative effects. Every action can bring about good or it can bring about bad. It depends on what you decide.

Mercy, as love and forgiveness, is not an easy path to choose. It is far easier to hang on to anger and just wallow in it. That is not to say that you will not be angry or hurt, but it is saying that you don’t need to allow it to rule you, that you don’t need to allow it to drive your life. As with hate, vengeance can poison and embitter the spirit and the heart.

Jordan Blaylock